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What Is Anger Management: Another Way OutA Complicated Definition Before asking what is anger management, people need to ask what is anger. When people think of anger, they think of violence, but aggressive anger is only one half of the spectrum. Anger management techniques work to prevent the expressions of passive anger as well as aggressive anger. Manipulation, obsessive behavior, self-blame, evasiveness and dispassion are all socially-harmful actions that can be prevented using anger management. While passive anger does not physically hurt other people, it can emotionally scar both the angry individual and his or her friends and family. Aggressive anger, such as threatening, selfishness, bullying, vengeance, mania and destructiveness are the behaviors that come to mind when one first questions what is anger management. These are the actions of criminals, of violence individuals, the type court-ordered into anger management programs. However, as stated above, aggressive anger is only one part of the definition of anger, and consequently, it is only one aim of anger management. Meditation, relaxation and deep breathing are techniques that can be used to calm both aggressive and passive anger, and are some of the cornerstones of anger management doctrine. The answer to what is anger management is active intervention. While typical self-control strategies can be used to de-escalate from an angered state, the ultimate goal of anger management is to avoid confrontational situations altogether. Individuals are taught to be direct and honorable; if they are angry, they need to prove their case in a non-abusive, non-manipulative way, using appropriate language and clear body signals. Angry feelings will occur, but they do not have to end in a fight, especially if individuals learn to remain focused on the problem and learn to remain persistent in their verbal self-defense. Angry individuals must also be forgiving, and must appear passionate and willing to listen. In the end, not every person who exhibits aggressive or passive anger will need anger management counseling; it is not the angry feeling, but the reaction to that angry feeling, that matters in the end. |
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